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Dieing inside once more
Sunday. 2.22.04 1:00 pm
My friends know me best for my eerie dreams. Though I do not dream these dreams all the time; they are random. Not even I understand them or know when they will happen. But there are a few dreams I have had recently that I may never forget.

But just in case I do... I better write them.

Dream one: Sometime near the end of December... It was dark outside and I was driving down the busiest street in my town. Oddly enough my town was completely empty and none of the street lights were working. The only light was the one coming from my truck and a light from a tiny store. He was in the passanger's seat... the boy I was still in love with. Though he broke my heart and used me like a classic video game, I still loved him.

We had broken up a few days before and I just picked him up for some unknown reason. I was quiet as we drove down the silent street. I had to be quiet because he told me if I talked he would jump out of my truck and never see me ever again. So I remained quiet. We somehow ended up in my old neighborhood which I hadn't seen since my parent's divorce. I couldn't take it anymore and I opened my mouth.

Sure enough, the crazy bastard jumped out of a moving truck and rolled onto the front yard of my old house. I stopped the vehicle and went out after him. Chasing him was a bitch but I finally caught him and had him pinned down in the grass.

Something took over me and there I was throwing question after question at him. Why did you do this? Do I deserve this? What did I do wrong? Why did you leave me? What came over you? Why? Why?! And he didn't answer me. He thrashed wildly under me and screamed and wailed for a long time. I finally calmed down and he did as well... he moaned and whimpered a bit and I was still frustrated.

Behind me I heard someone calling, "I'm coming Ashley!" But I ignored it. I looked back down at my ex and glared at him... he glared back just as coldly. One more time I spoke weakly, "Why did you do this to me?...

Then I woke up...

See what I mean?

Dream two: Mid-January

It was after school and my friend Deidre and I were walking out of our last class. We had to walk down V hall in order to exit the school and get to the parking lot. So we turned down the usual hall and talked to each other about our day and our plans for the weekend. As usual we had to walk by my ex boyfriend and his best friend because they left school at the opposite exit.

As we passed each other I muttered "asshole" and went on. He must have heard because mere seconds later I heard him growl and call out my name. I turned around ever so angrily and asked what he wanted. He shook his head and turned back away from him.

Rolling my eyes I responded, "Yeah that's real cute. Idiot..." Deidre laughed then me and her headed back towards our exit. More seconds passed and I noticed Deidre kept turning her head and looking back. Finally she told me that my ex was following us. I told her to ignore him and kept on walking. But Deidre was getting worried so I quickened my pace.

We reached the exit and walked out. I heard the exit doors slam twice so I knew he was still following us. As I neared my car I was about to turn around to tell him to sod off. But before I could turn I felt two arms wrap around my shoulders from behind.

My whole body froze and my heart burned as these arms held me tightly. I knew who was doing this.. I could smell his cologne, feel his breath against my ear and see his dark hair shadowing his face out of the corner of my eye. I looked at Deidre for aid... but she took off.

I began to shake as he held me silently. Slowly, we both started to sink to the concrete. But before we hit the ground... I woke up.

I have a few more... I will add them later.

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